Little Talks
by StellarSlayer
Summary: He's gone. He's dead. That isn't possible. He wasn't supposed to die. I think they are expecting me to go crazy and kill myself. I would. But I can't. I have to live now.


He's gone. He's dead. That isn't possible. He wasn't supposed to die. That attack was aimed at me. It was such a huge dragon. I didn't have a chance. I didn't think he would actually die either. He was the strong, brave, silly Natsu I loved. I had so much to tell him too.

Someone told me they would help pay my rent so I could mourn since I was closer to him than I was with anyone else in the guild. I barely heard them all though. Gray and Loke were going to stay with me a while to "help". I think they are expecting me to go crazy and kill myself. I would. But I can't. I have to live now.

Gray and Loke would be with me now but I said I was going to Natsu's. They cringed at the thought of going to his house and it made they worry about me more. I convinced them that I wouldn't be alone; I would have Happy and Plue. Still worried, they allowed it. Loke went back to the spirit world in case I need him. Plue appeared and stayed quietly in my arms.

His house came into view and I stop. Happy's wings disappear and he lands with a small plop on my shoulder. I could tell he was trying not to cry. I felt bad. For some reason I couldn't cry. I just stared at this old little hut. I sat down on the dirt path leading to Happy's old home. I moved Plue in my arms so I could bring happy down into my arms too.

"Lucy, I don't think I can keep going. I don't think I can get any closer." Happy cried.

"I don't think I can either. I don't remember why I wanted to come." I sighed. I shouldn't have come. It was bad idea. And I shouldn't have made Happy come either. I knew he wouldn't want to sse this place with all its memories. I sat Plue and Happy on the ground. "You two can sit here. I'm going in real quick. If I'm not out in 20 minutes, Plue, get Loke, and, Happy, get Gray. I may need help."

Happy looked up at me with sad eyes and nodded his head. I turned to face the hut. My heart ached but I had to keep going. When I got to the door, I stopped again. I've been here a few times, but every time it has been lively. Because Natsu was alive. I open the door.

Inside it was still as messy as the first time I came. I walked farther in and passed by some souvenirs that Natsu had collected over the years. A lot were from missions we had done together. I sighed and kept walking. After a couple of times around his hut I decided I didn't like walking around this old and empty house. It brought back too many moments. I got to an old dusty couch and lay down. Oh how I missed him.

* * *

I saw her. That beautiful blonde that I loved so much. She was here. Walking around my old house. I am glad she is ok. When I jumped in front of that dragon attack, I was terrified that even if I were to stop it something was to happen to her. I knew that attack was powerful and I had a good idea that I might not make it. But if it were to save her, I'd do anything. Without her, if she had died, if I hadn't saved her. I wouldn't have been able to live. Losing guild members who I loved was one thing. I'd be sad, but life would have kept going, like it had when Lisanna disappeared. But if I lost Lucy, There would be no point in going on. She gave my life meaning. When I felt I wasn't strong enough, she made me stronger.

So I saved her. I gave my life for her. I was glad I did. She can keep living now. I know all of the guild will watch over her and keep her safe now that I can't. I'll always be watching over her though.

But she's here now. This is the first time I've seen her since I saved her. She looks beautiful but sad and as though she hasn't slept in days. I get closer. She walks around staring at every detail and I can see in her eyes all the memories. Her hand trembles at her side. I reach for her hand.

It passes right through mine. I forget. I'm dead. A ghost. I can't hold her hand and walk with her anymore.

Lucy finds my couch and lays down. She closes her eyes, remember those days she came over. I walk around the room and the stairs leading up to the front door creak.

Lucy's eyes open and she looks around. But then disappointment runs over her features. It was as if she were looking for me, expecting me to be there (which I am, she just can't see me). All I want is to tell her to close her eyes and rest.

Her eyes fill with a darkness and I worry. She could do something stupid. I couldn't save her this time. And none of those idiots from the guild came with her. No one could help her.

Then she started crying. I rush over to her side. I hear her whispering to herself. "I can't trust myself. I need to stop this. I should probably go."

Though she said she should leave, she remained where she was. It was killing me to see her this way.

I bring my hand up and cup her face.

* * *

I was close to tears and I knew it. All these thoughts running through my mind, a voice. It needed to stop before I lost it. I can't afford to lose it right now.

And then I felt it. A touch. His touch.

My eyes widen in shock. "Natsu?"

I look up and maybe I was just imagining things but there he was. A faded image of Natsu was looking down at me with sad eyes.

"Natsu?" He seemed a little surprised when I said his name again but then smiled. "But you can't be here. You're dead."

"Nothing can keep me away from you, Luce. I can only remain visible for a short time and I have no idea how I'm doing it now."

"But you've gone away. I watched you disappear. This is all that's left of you? A ghost? A spirit? You have to stay with me, Natsu!"

"We're torn apart, Luce. There's nothing either of us can do about it."

"Natsu," my eyes were filled with tears. "I love you. Don't leave me. Please." I reached her hand out but of course it fell through him. I brought my hands up to my face and cried into them.

"Luce." His voice was so warm and loving. It calmed me down a bit and I looked up. His head was turned towards the door like he was sensing someone coming. I didn't sense in magic power but I could just not be trying hard enough. He looked back to me and but his heads on either side of me. "Luce, let me go. Don't tell them you saw me, okay? You have to move on. I love you, Luce, so I promise we'll meet again soon."

"But I don't…" then I heard it the distant sound of Gray calling my name. "Wait for me, Natsu. I'll see you when I fall asleep." He smiled and started fading. Then I remembered something. "Natsu! I never got the chance to tell you. I.."

He stopped me with his hand touching my face. "I already know. That's why I had to save you." He kissed my forehead. "You might want to tell them though." And he disappeared.

Tears streamed down my face.

"Lucy!" The door busted open and a flash of light shone next to me. Gray and Loke were at my side in seconds. Loke brought his arms around me and pulled me into him. Gray got down on one knee in front of us, waiting to see if I was okay.

"Lucy?" Gray seemed cautious. "Happy came and got me. Said he was worried about you. He heard you talking and crying. Are you okay?"

With tears still filling my eyes, I shook my head. "I have something to tell you guys." I couldn't do it. Well I couldn't do it here. "Can you bring me back to my place first? I couldn't, can't, tell you here."

They look at each other and nod. Gray heads for the door. Loke stands up, picking me up with him. There was a flash of light and then another, and I'm in my room. We must have passed through the spirit world so we wouldn't have to walk through the streets. I am thankful for that.

Loke brings me over to sit on my couch just as Gray is coming through the door. Gray sits next to us and turns to face me. "So what do you have to tell us?"

I sit there trying to find the right words. "Me and Natsu were. . . together. We never told anybody." Neither said a word, only looking slightly more upset. "There's something else. I never got to tell him but I think he already knew, maybe before I did. I loved him very much." The two guys just looked at me. "And. . . I. . I'm pregnant."

Both of the guys eyes went wide. Loke was the first to find words. "When did you find out?"

I sighed. "A few weeks ago. I didn't want to tell everyone because I was scared. Then when I finally got up the courage to tell Natsu, he. . . ."

The guys looked down. "Guys. . ." They both look up at me. "I'm even more scared now. I don't know what to do." I brought my hands to my eyes to wipe away some tears.

Gray grabbed my hands and pulled them from my face. "Lucy, look at me." I looked up at him passed the tears that threatened to pour. "Lucy, it's okay. Everything is going to be okay. We will take care of you. The guild is family and we take care of family no matter the problem." His eyes were almost stern but were soft at the same time. They softened as I stared into them. "And this, you being pregnant, is happy news. We should be celebrating at the guild." I smiled. "Though Mira might try to kill you for not telling her about you and Natsu being a couple." I laughed. Mira's reaction would probably be the funniest.

I had this great family and everything was going to be okay. Natsu was right. I had to keep moving. I had to keep living for this baby, for this little part of Natsu that was growing inside me. Then I had a thought that made me kind of sad.

My face must have given something away. "Luce?" Loke's voice was sweet as honey and almost made me giggle. I looked at him. He had this knowing look in his eyes. "We will help. We will always be here for you." I half smiled, trying to reassure them.

Gray coughed. "So when shall we tell everyone?"

I hadn't thought about that. Today would be good just to get it over with but the sun was already setting and I was tired from crying so much. "Tomorrow. I'll tell everyone tomorrow." The guys nodded and agreed a rest would do us good.

Gray helped make dinner and decided to stay the night on my couch. I laid in bed for a long time staring at the ceiling. How was I going to tell everyone? Would I be able to tell everyone without crying? I wished Natsu was here now. He'd know what to do. He'd probably just say it out loud.

I was finally able to get to sleep.

And in my dreams,

I saw my love,

Just like I said I would.

* * *

So this was just supposed to be a songfic but I kept writing... so now it's turned into a story. And there will be more. Because I'm stupid and keep thinking.

I'm adding more chapters to When Life Takes a Turn and For the People You Love (not right now because I'm stupid and have more story ideas I want to get on here first).

My mind runs 100 miles an hour and has like 1000000 tabs open. Since it's summer and I have a lot of time, all of my stories will be up to date and you will be getting more stories.

I had something else I was going to say... Oh well I'll remember it later and post it on my next story. or next chapter. which ever comes first..


End file.
